The Man Who Listened... (ANOTHER MALE COMMENT!)

I would LOVE every women to read this comment by a man!

ok, so I have been shown your blog by my wife and I find it interesting. The following are my

thoughts. I currently think my wife and I could compete with you for "the worst" sex life. 10+ years of marriage, 3 kids with one being a just over 1 year have taken the toll on us. I, being male, do think with my lower head like pretty much like every male out there. And yes your "whoop there it is" post would apply to me as well, you want to know why? Well you never know when that split second of horny might happen.

Don't get me wrong I know I am a little annoying with it but I would take anything I can get right now. My wife expresses your same contempt for her body as you do; childbirth has done its damage... to the both of us! My sympathy weight came on with hers. My wife tells me that she is not happy with her body and that is why she would rather not have sex. She doesn't feel sexy. I am nothing to look at right now either but I am working on it. I know my wife loves me I just wish that physical connection was there and more frequent.

I have yet to meet or even hear about the woman that is into sex, that isn't getting paid for it, like men are. We are interested in having sex pretty much at anytime in anyplace. Do you enjoy sex? Do you have sex with your husband to get it over with or to please yourself? Do you have the big O every time? Do you tell your husband what you want? The answer to these will reveal some issues I think.

I think your goal for $5000 is great and I am pretty sure you will get “donations” from your husband as well if he is smart.

But while I mention him let me tell you something about the picture you paint about him. You paint with your words as well as Bob Ross painting some happy little trees. Your husband sounds like a Jack Ass. Does he dig ditches for a living? Is his job stressful? Missile command? Air traffic control? Construction? A 3 hour nap after work? Are you fu***** kidding me? I have worked some shitty jobs in my day but after 1 week I am used to the schedule and can function after work. You say your husband reads this blog, well I hope he reads this part, GROW UP! The days of Ward and June Cleaver died out long ago. Participate with your family before it is only weekends that you get to see your kids. Ok that might have been a little harsh but if the painting that I am looking at fits the subject, I don't think I am.

I have a pretty easy job. I am a desk jockey in the technical field, but I worked hard to get where I am. I help out at home quite a bit if I do say so myself. My day would be like this. Wake up with the kids and help with them to be ready to be out the door for school; go to work; come home and help with kids, house, dinner, whatever; help get the kids to bed; spend time doing my own things and hang out with the wife till she falls asleep or I do. Personally I run on about 5-6 hours of sleep, more than that and I feel worse off. I know I could be the exception to the rule that you state but that is how I feel things in a modern home should be.

I am not saying that your situation is any better than mine, but I see your switches quite clearly. If I knew that “dishes = sex” you would never see a dish in the sink. You are laying out the treasure map for your husband. Hell if this was Dora the Explorer some freaky little map would be jumping up and down right now yelling "LAWN, DISHES, PLEASURE VALLEY!"
I am interested to follow you along on your journey and see where or what becomes of this. I will probably comment again but I will try to keep it brief. Maybe I can find the Treasure map at my house along the way.

My response:
Oh my goodness! Where to begin!
First off, THANK YOU for what seems to be such an honest comment. AND I LOVED the “DORA THE EXPLORER” add in, I was just LAUGHING my ass off! It was great! Just the fact you know the show shows me that you are in tune with your kids.
Secondly, My husband is not a "Jack ASS" he's not perfect for sure but who is? I'm the only one allowed to call him namses!

To answer your questions… Honestly?
Do you have sex with your husband to get it over with: Yes. Not ALWAYS to get it over with but because I know he needs it at least once in awhile and I’m his wife, sooooo…..And RARELY to just please myself. I could go MONTHS without it and never give it a second thought.

Do you have the big O every time? No. I have a little “O” here and there and once in awhile a medium to large “O” I don’t have easy “O”’s by any means it takes some effort and being as I usually start out with “ok, we have about 3.5 min before the baby wakes up so make it quick!” I think I pretty much set the pace right out of the gate. To be honest, I really don’t care to have the big “O” that much. And from talking to a lot of my friends, they don’t care either. I think it means more to the man that he is able to deliver the big “O” than to women that she has one. It gives him a sense of validation in the bedroom.


I appreciate the fact that you actually understood what I was saying about the helping around the house. What most men seem to miss is the helping on a CONSISTANT basis. Not “I need sex so I’m loading the dishwasher tonight!”
I think a lot of the issues in my household I set right at the beginning of our marriage. I did everything! I never asked for help. I wanted to be the “June Cleaver” house wife, and my husband, being an only child and always having everything done for him fell into the roll perfectly. But as life changed so did I. Now I want to bitch slap June Cleaver tell her put on a T Shirt and sweat pants and gain some weight so the rest of us can feel normal!
I think it’s great that you are so involved in the day to day but obviously the sex life isn’t on track so that isn’t the issue. For me it’s part of it, not all of it. I have found talking to other women that some men that help A LOT usually don’t seem t feed their wives ‘Emotional’ needs. My husband is constantly telling me how great I am, but it’s just not enough to get me in the sack!
I honestly think that if I can start working on MYSELF and he start helping more we will meet in the middle. I would LOVE for you to continue to follow and comment and maybe we’ll find your map as well! It’s so important to hear different perspectives. So….
COME ON BONAMOS! Everybody let’s go! Come let’s get to it, I KNOW THAT WE CAN DO IT!
Where are we going? ….. TO GET SOME SEX!

Walking for a TUMMY TUCK UPDATE: I raised another $13.00 That's 13 more miles! I've walked 2 miles. I know have 14 miles to catch up on so I better get off my ass and start moving!!

THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT!!! I LOVE YOU ALL~